Pakistan – a society so civil that it is not ready to lower its morals and talk about sex. Talking about sex does not mean promoting it. Sex education simply means discussing and teaching all things associated with sex and sexuality. With the world promoting sex education, sex education in Pakistan still remains taboo.
It is essential to keep in mind that sex education does not promote the act but educates people regarding the complexities and absurdities of it. It allows exploring values and maintaining ones own sexual health. Keeping good sexual health is not synonyms with keeping a hyperactive sexual life. It means to learn to deal with your sexuality in accordance with your age, gender, religion, culture and norms.
Owing to the rise in sexual assault cases, it is high time we start promoting sex education in Pakistan. Your child should know what is sexually acceptable and what is not. They should know what sexual discomfort is and how to deal with it. Your child should know about the good touch and bad touch. Luckily an effective strategy for sex education in Pakistan can teach your child all they need to know. And no, it won’t teach them how to do sex but how to protect themselves from all the heinous acts involving sex and sexuality.
We don’t know how long it will take to make sex education a part of our curriculum and when we will be able to run public campaigns about it. Till then, the best you can do is to educate yourself and your children. It is important to keep in mind the following
Educate Yourself First
To educate others, it is important to educate yourself first. Living in a conservative society like Pakistan, you may have to unlearn and relearn a lot of things. Starting with what sex education is, you need to earn its importance, the right way to deliver it. Sex education in Pakistan is still taboo, and you might feel uncomfortable learning about it. You have to make yourself comfortable first before you talk to anybody else.
Start with the basics. Learn about all forms of sexual assault, read about ways to tackle them and then ways to overcome them. You may need to read about sexualities and how to cater to them.
Break The Ice First
Going in with a bang and telling your child about what’s right and wrong will either scare them or leave them questioning. You don’t have to sit in a quiet, dark room to give sex education to your child. You can do it in a subtle way. You should use TV shows and music videos that raise ethical issues as springboards for discussion.
It’s often the everyday moments – like riding in the car or putting away groceries – that provide the best opportunities to talk. Don’t lecture your child or use scare tactics to discourage any discussion about the topic. Instead, listen carefully. Ensure that you understand the challenges, pressures, and concerns your teen faces. It would be best if you let your child know that it’s okay to talk to you about it whenever they have questions or concerns. Answer questions by saying, “I’m so glad you came to me.”
Address Even The Toughest Of The Topics
You can pick and choose what to and what not to tell your child. But the reason behind this should not be your fear or hesitation of discussing some topics. Keep in mind that now your child has everything in his hand, just a click away. If you don’t answer their questions, they will find the answers on the internet. And trust me, the web has very little good to show. It is better to make them understand things the way you want. Once they go out to find answers, you will not be able to control what they learn anymore.
Learn To Respond To Your Childs Behavior
Even if you don’t think your teen is ready, you should keep the conversation going if they become sexually active. Don’t be afraid to speak your mind. You should let your teen know you expect them to take sexual decisions and the responsibilities associated with them seriously.
Learn more about understanding and reacting to your child behaviour.
Teach Them The Good And Bad Touch
Children are often told how to keep themselves safe: Look both ways before crossing the street. Wear seatbelts. Don’t play with matches and fire. However, some conversations are more difficult than others. Among them is the topic of sexual abuse. Parents often delay discussing inappropriate touching with their children.
Unfortunately, due to the taboo around sex education in Pakistan, parents here do not delay but simply skimp on discussing this with their children.
Tell your kids about different kinds of touches. Touches, when done in a caring way, always feel safe. Children are capable of recognizing a pat on the back or a warm hug as a safe touch. Unsafe touches that may cause emotional or physical harm are easily recognizable too. Teach your child to say no whenever they detect a bad touch.
Sex may seem like a topic too absurd to talk with your children about. But as absurd as it sounds, it is essential to give sex education to your children. Sex education is all about making your child more aware of their body. The increased awareness may lead to increased alertness and a better strategy for protection. This makes sex education in Pakistan all the more critical. A psychologist can help you best and guide you all about what you need to teach your child.
1. Who should give sex education to your children?
Parents and teachers can give the best sex education to children.
2. At what age should a child be given sex education?
A child should be given sex education as soon as they hit puberty. But the basics like good touch and bad touch should be taught from the very start.
3. Should girls and boys be given the same sex education?
Although the basics are the same, you will have to be gender-specific while talking about certain topics.
Book an appointment now to seek professional help. You can book an appointment with top psychologists in Pakistan through Marham by calling the Marham helpline: 0311-1222398 or by online booking facility through the website or Marham mobile app.
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