Talk to Internal Medicine on Headaches, Thanatophobia

Salam Alikum , I am currently based in Paris ( France) About 25 years. I get headaches, Tension headache mostly and sometimes Migraines. My jaws are always clinched. I have an erratic behaviour. Hate loud noise. Sensitive to light. My cousin has Brain Tumour and he got operated and survived. I have this phobia and I can't get rid of it. It became severe in the last 6 years. I did 2 MRI in the last 5 years and 1 recently in November in which everything is clear. I get stress headache and my Brian is constantly weaving this net of Brain Tumour. Couldn't sleep. Get panic attacks. Have used Antidepressant for 5 years but it didn't help. I really need your help as in France, it really difficult to express your feelings when there is language barrier. My life sometime comes to stand still. I lost my parents, 2 brother and a sister in last 25 years. I am father of 3 beautiful kids. I really need help or I have very bad thought to hurt or even end my life.