Talk to Sexologist on Problem During Intercourse

My husband has been facing the problem in doing intercourse since 7 years. He's completely unable to do the process because his penis doesn't get tight whenever we want to have sex his penis is not getting tight But can eject while sleeping or sometimes during sex he asks me for oral sex to get discharged. His sex drive is extremely low and can easily live up without sex for months. What should he do? Any recommendations? Medicines? Problem is that he'll never ever visit any doctor or go for any test but he would take medicines. I've a daughter and I really want to go for a second baby. Please help