Have you ever let some insensitive comments about your pregnancy or your baby throws you into a panic? So, You’re not alone. Every pregnant woman and new moms has had to grin and bear spontaneous advice from total strangers, not to mention people whether they are friends and relatives. But why do people dole out their advice so freely? I saw many women, they feel an instant bond with any pregnant stranger or new mom. This bond, which causes normal social boundaries to disintegrate & worsen, giving people a feeling that they now have license to make comments when normally they would hold back. Yes, sometimes their advice can indeed be a lifesaver. But not every suggestion is sympathetic.
Ignoring unwanted advice is one way to keep your soundness, but if the source of that advice is someone, you have to deal with regularly, like your Mother-In-Law or members of your extended family. This can be a little trickier. It’s hard to keep puffing them off and they may insist that they know best.
First knowledge is a key! Learn all you can about pregnancy, childbirth, breastfeeding, and so forth, with the help of trusted baby books, websites, videos, forums, groups, social media etc. This way, you can easily carry on a conversation and know what to disregard whenever the advice fairies strike you.
Don’t dismiss everything
You don’t need to dismiss everything. It’s probably safe to ignore most of the comments you get during pregnancy and your baby’s infancy, but occasionally, you might pluck a nugget of valuable information from the onslaught of advice. Even if you never learn anything useful, look on the bright sides & aspirations. Who knows listening to all those stories may make you more pitying & sympathetic towards other new moms in the future.
Rude Or Impolite Comments
It’s easy to laugh out some uninvited comments, but others may be undermining a woman’s confidence at a vulnerable time. New mom knows more than they realize, and they should feel confident about trusting and they should confide their instincts.
Many parents are mostly astonished at rude comments that they don’t know how to respond. I think it’s better for you to rise above it. If you respond to rudeness with rudeness, you’re going to feel bad afterward. A great line to use, if you’re not comfortable with being bold or don’t like confronting people but want to get your point across. Say “Thanks for the response.”
Annoying or not, the free will advice will keep on coming. Try not to be on the defense boat before you hear someone. Plus, believe it or not, there is a chance you could actually learn a tip or two. If not, ignore and carry on.
Choose Topics Wisely
At family gatherings and get-together, try to avoid hot topics, in order to refrain from any know-it-all busy-bodying. Answer any personal questions with light and positive answers and then move on.
Turn it back on them
Say, “Sounds like you had a difficult pregnancy,” with an air of finality. You can end up the conversation but don’t insult or challenge anyone.
If you can, try to extend your friend circle to other moms and moms-to-be that have your same parenting style. This forum will be your saving grace when others are driving you crazy ^_^ .